Saving Edward
by dez3b
Summary: When something from Edward's past comes back to haunt him he retreats into himself. Can Bella save him from himself. Rated M for future chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Bella POV

He just sat there, staring off into space. Whatever I did, whatever I said, he just wouldn't respond. Everyone tried everything, but it was no use. Jasper had fled the house in frustration, unable to deal with the unique combination of self-loathing and pain that radiated from Edward.

"Bella," I heard Alice's voice tinkle behind me, "I need you."

I sighed, more wedding plans. I quickly hugged Edward and kissed him on the forehead, "I'll be back soon, if you need anything…"I trailed off, not knowing what to say.

He looked at me, offering up a weak smile, "I'll be fine," before returning to his position staring at the floor.

I followed Alice out of the room while she led me to Esme's studio.

"Hello Esme," I greeted the gentle woman I had come to regard as my second mother before turning back to Alice as she closed the door, "What is it today Alice? Flowers, catering, centerpieces?" I sighed once more.

Alice and Esme exchanged glances before Alice responded with, "This isn't about the wedding…this is about Edward."

"Do you know why he is feeling the way he does?" Esme inquired of me.

I shook my head, "He won't talk to me," I said, trying not to sound too dejected.

"Years ago, when Edward left Carlisle and myself he went….hunting," Esme said. I nodded, Edward told me that he had rebelled at some point after becoming a vampire and gone hunting after people instead of the animals that the Cullen's vegetarian lifestyle currently included. "Do you know why he came back?" Esme queried of me.

"He said he got sick of doing it…and what he had become."

Esme and Alice exchanged a glance before Esme continued, "I normally wouldn't tell you this Bella because it's not really my place, but I feel as if I have no choice." She paused before taking a breath to continue, "Edward followed a man down an alley where he thought the man was pursuing a young girl. The man was… but it turned out it was the man's daughter, but Edward didn't catch that in time." Esme stopped, seemingly unable to continue.

Alice picked up where Esme left off, "Edward killed the man, snapped his neck and sucked him dry…but not before making him suffer, not before the girl saw it. And then he realized what he had done. He heard the little girl's thoughts, she was only 5 or 6, she had ran off from her father in a crowded area of the city and he was coming to find her and take her home," Alice paused, taking in my expression of shock before she continued, "Edward fled, he never fully got over it."

I mulled this story over for moment before posing the question that was forming in my mind, "But why is it hitting him now, he's never mentioned it before?"

Esme replied, "Edward was in Seattle a week ago, he had gone to look for a wedding present for you," Esme smiled at her son's consideration before the well-known frown replaced it, "that's when he saw her."

My confused expression gave me away so Alice filled in the rest, "the little girl, she's quite old now, but Edward recognized her…and the girl him, she was very confused, she told her family, but they didn't believe her. Who would, a story about a man who didn't age who sucked her father's blood when she was so young? Her family probably thought her feeble."

"But Edward heard it all," Esme replied, "and now he's…." she trailed off, letting Edward's current state speak for itself.

They didn't speak and I tried to take everything in. I knew Edward had killed people, I knew he had hunted the bad ones for a while. I just didn't know this.

"How do we help him?" I asked

Esme smiled, "I always knew you were the one for Edward."

Alice jumped in, "We have an idea. I think it will work, but Edward's mind is…fuzzy and indecisive on such things. It will be up to you to help."

"What do I need to do?" I immediately asked. I would do anything for him, he was my life, my other half, my soul mate.

Alice and Esme exchanged a glance before Alice went to the closet and pulled out a shopping bag before handing it to me.

"What is this?" I inquired.

"What you need to do," Alice replied.

I opened it before pulling out some scraps of black lace…at least that's what they looked like to me, but there was little of it was hard to tell.

It was then that realization dawned on me while my eyes widened, "Alice…Esme…I don't…Edward won't…this.." I couldn't even forma coherent sentence.

"Now Bella," Esme replied, "Edward is very much...,"she searched for the right word," attracted to you."

"I'll say, Jasper practically jumps me every time he feels Edward's emotions around you," Alice grinned while I blushed. Esme shot her a look.

"Edward was rather...depressed and unhappy before you came into the picture, now he is vibrant and wonderful again. Do you now he had practically stopped playing the piano before you had come?" Esme said it as if there were no worse alternative in the world, "He's happy with you, part of that is emotional, but part of that is connected to the physical level, that's how it works with us," she stated, referring to vampires in general I assumed.

I found my voice once more, though how I have no idea, "But…how do you know this will work, Edward's very much against any sort of…activity," I blushed before continuing on, "I'm not sure he'll go for this."

"That's where you come in," Alice beamed.

"What do you mean?" I asked, suspicion creeping into my voice.

"You have to seduce him," she replied simply.

"How?!" I shouted before I could contain the words.

Before Alice could speak again, Esme intervened, "Bella, I would never ask you to do anything you weren't comfortable with, but I have feeling that you would have no problem with any sort of physical relationship with Edward," she paused and I looked down and nodded, biting my lip and embarrassed beyond belief, "there's no reason to be embarrassed Bella. It's perfectly normal; in fact, you could talk to Carlisle-"

"Please no," I shouted, interjecting, this was bad enough with Esme, but with Carlisle I didn't know what I would do, probably die of embarrassment right before his eyes.

She smiled, "Of course, it's just," she paused and looked errantly out the window, "I don't know what to do anymore, nothing works, I just…I'm his mother and I know I have no right to ask you," the words were coming in a blur, so fast I had to strain to hear them all," but you've saved him before, so many times, brought true happiness to this house, I must ask you again…Bella, please try," her eyes pleaded with me.

Sweet Esme, like my own mother, how could I say no to her. I nodded, "Esme, I'll try, but," I paused, trying to form the words around my embarrassment, "I don't really know how to do this," I spoke each word slowly and distinctly, unable to phrase my situation any better.

Alice jumped in, rushing over and putting her arms around me, "Don't worry, just go back to the room and put on the outfit, say you need his opinion on a wedding outfit, then just, go with it," she smiled, knowingly.

I groaned, "Very helpful Alice, you're not telling me something," it was a statement, not a question.

She smiled innocently, "Me, never."

Esme smiled, "we'll get everyone out of the house so you can have some privacy dear…do your best," she said heading to the door.

"Good luck," Alice kissed me on the cheek before exiting.

I groaned to myself, this would not be easy.


	2. Chapter 2warning, lemon

I picked up the bag, not daring to look inside lest I lose my courage and walked down the hall as I heard the Cullens rather noisily exit the house, noisy for vampires at least before reaching the door of Edward's room.

"Where is everyone going?" he asked as I entered.

I gulped," I don't know," I replied, telling myself it wasn't a lie because I really didn't know.

"Oh, he said simply, before eyeing the bag I was carrying, "What's in there."

"It's just something Alice wanted me to get your opinion on for the wedding," I said too quickly, praying he chalked my hearts erratic beating up to wedding issues.

"Let's see it Bella," he replied, eyeing me warily. He knew something was up, and I once more thanked God for whatever quirk kept him from reading my thoughts, I just hoped Alice had been careful in her thinking and planning of this around him.

"I have to put it on to show you," I said, heading toward his bathroom.

"I thought I wasn't supposed to see you in your wedding dress until the day of," he replied, obviously confused.

"It's not the dress," I said, again too quickly, my heartbeat betraying me with every second, "I'll just show you." I raced into the bathroom and shut the door behind me before he questioned me further.

I placed the bag on the counter before taking a deep breath and opening it once more. I pulled out the black, lacy scraps from before to better examine them and laid them on the counter as I striped out of my clothes.

There was a black, balconet bra, held together with black lace straps that would cover very little, and black lacy boy shorts that would probably cover less.

Wrestling with my courage, I put them on without looking in the mirror, much too afraid of what I would see, when I noticed a show box. I sighed, Alice and her shoes.

I heard him flit quickly to the door when I sighed," Bella?" he asked, obviously rather concerned, "are you ok?"

"Yes," I struggled to get the word out, "it's just Alice and her love of shoes." I didn't hear him move from the door and figured I ought to reassure him further, "its ok, just sit down Edward, I'll be out in a minute."

I could imagine him on the other side of the door, debating with himself as to the truth of my words, but his mind was already elsewhere and I heard him return to the black leather couch he was sitting on when I had walked in.

I suppressed a sigh of relief, afraid of having him burst through the door before I was ready and opened the show box. Inside were black, patent leather heels with a ribbon running around the edge, woven through before coming to a stop in a bow right about the open toe.

The heels were at least five inches high and very thin.

I silently cursed my sister-to-be as I stepped into the shoes, desperately trying not to wobble. What did she expect? I was less than graceful and these were only asking for a trip to the emergency room, not really what was needed at this point.

It was at that moment that I looked into the mirror to observe my hair that I loosed form it's ponytail and let fall around my face in what I hoped was a seductive manner, when I saw myself.

My skin was truly visible, the pale white contrasting nicely with the dark black of the lace, very little of it covering my body. I looked…sexy, at least I think I did, I just hoped that Edward thought so. I just hoped that this would help.

Once again suppressing the urge to sigh, I opened the door into his room and walked forward, praying that I wouldn't trip over these death traps that Alice called shoes.

It was dark inside the room, the moonlight streaming through the windows behind the couch where Edward sat. I couldn't see very well, but I knew he could.

"Bella," I heard him take a sharp intake of breath.

"What do you think," I managed to squeak out as I walked slowly toward him, hoping it looked seductive, but truly just trying not to break a bone.

He growled. Where did that come from?!, I wondered to myself.

"Bella," he said in a low voice I never heard before as I advanced on him, "is this what Alice was planning?"

I came to a stop in front of him, "do you really want to think about Alice right now?," I inquired before going for broke and sitting down atop him, my knees positioned on either side.

He looked into my eyes, "Bella, we can't…we made a deal."

I sighed, "I know Edward, and we don't have to," he looked at me in surprise, "it's just that…I'm worried about you. You won't talk to me, to anyone. No one knows what to do. You don't need to even kiss me tonight, just talk to me, tell me what's wrong, explain to me why you feel the way you do and maybe I can help you, "the words came rushing forth and they were true, I was nervous of what I was doing, but I was more worried about Edward, unsure of how to help him, "Please, " I added.

"Bella," he sighed, "I…,"he started again, "I've done things…terrible things, and they came back to haunt me. I'm afraid if I tell you, you'll…" he trailed off, unwilling to speak.

"What Edward?"

"I'm afraid that you won't…love me anymore," he refused to meet my gaze.

I grabbed his face and turned it to face me, "Edward Cullen, you could never do anything that would make me not love you."

He grabbed me wrists, looking up at me, "yes I could, you have no idea-"

I cut him off, removing my right hand from his grasp and placing my fingers over his mouth to silence him, "Edward…Esme already told me," he looked at me, his eyes widening in what could only be described as terror, "About the little girl," his eyes got bigger, "and I don't care. I know you made a mistake, but you can't keep hurting yourself over it. It was bad, but it doesn't make me love you one bit less than before."

He looked at me, bewildered, "You mean…you don't…you still want me…still love me?"

I nodded.

What happened next was a blur as I found myself flat on my back on the couch, Edward above me, his lips crushing mine, desperate to feel me. I responded, kissing back with all my might, waiting for the moment in which he sighed and pulled away.

It didn't happen.

"Bella," he whispered as his mouth released mine, letting me breath, he moved it along my jaw line up toward my earlobe, "Bella, you have no idea how much I love you."

I could only murmur in response as his teeth nipped at my earlobe. My hands ran over his back, entangling them in his hair as I lifted my face to kiss him, anywhere, everywhere.

His hand responded by moving down, along my sides, before coming back up over my chest and hesitantly grabbing my breasts.

I moaned, my eyes closing, my body shivering, willing him to do more, but he stopped.

I opened my eyes, ready to beg, plead, anything to make him continue.

He stared down at my body before looking at me, "Bella, I…I want you so much, please…can I, "he grasped the straps of bra and I could only nod as he wrapped one arm around my waist and used his other to reach for the clasp. He groped widely, trying to unclasp it as I ran my tongue along his neck, before biting down on his collar bone.

He moaned, before breaking the clasp, clawing at the lace desperately.

"Wait," I looked up at him. He looked afraid. I laughed.

I twisted slightly, slipping the bra off of my shoulders sp he couldn't quite see everything. I discarded it, before lying back again, my fair hair splayed around me.

He looked down at me, his eyes searching every inch of my body before coming to rest on my chest. I become self-conscious, and moved my arms involuntarily to cover myself.

"Bella," he leaned down, his lips brushing my earlobe, kissing me along my neck, "please don't cover yourself, you are the most beautiful creature I have ever seen."

I blushed furiously while he cupped my cheek before leaning down to kiss me. His hands continued their wandering causing me to moan and whimper. His lips left mine and continued their journey southward, pausing at my breasts.

He placed his lips over my right nipple, licking and sucking, rolling his tongue over the sensitive bud while his left hand preoccupied itself by grabbing my right nipple and rolling it between his fingers.

I moaned and my arms thrashed, trying to find something to grab onto, settling on entwining them in his hair.

I could feel the pressure building within me, more furiously than it ever had before. My legs were involuntarily drawn together, rubbing them against one another, trying to find the friction my body craved.

The wetness flowed out of me, drenching the black silk that cradled my hips and a vague portion of mind thought that I should be embarrassed, but I couldn't manage, not with what Edward was doing to me. Surely, he must smell my desire, my arousal, my lust for him.

Sensing my needs, his lips began to travel further down my body, pausing occasionally on a particularly sensitive spot that elicited sounds I never thought possible. He paused at my hip, tracing his tongue along the contours of the bone there, causing my hips to involuntarily lift upward.

I needed to feel his lips on mine and I ranked his head upwards toward mine with all of my strength. Of course, I didn't have the strength to do it on my own, but he drew his head upwards, pausing once more at my breasts, nipping on lighting between his teeth.

"Oh," I shot upward and shivers racked my body at the delicious sensation.

He chuckled and very quietly said, "I'll have to remember that."

I growled, which he seemed to find amusing as well, and continued drawing him toward me.

I crashed my lips upward toward him as he met me on his way down towards me, supporting his weight on his arms, positioned on either side of my head.

The kiss grew and we moved closer toward each other when I felt his arousal brush across my center, causing us both to moan.

The kiss continued as Edward ground into me while I bucked upwards. My frustration at the clothing between us grew, and it must have for him when he growled, and broke the kiss off.

Tracing his lips toward my ear, he leaned toward and blew, causing more shivers and another moan.

"Don't move," he said in a tone that brooked no compromise. Besides, I had no intention of doing anything that might make him stop.

In a flash he left me and was by my side once more…sans clothing.

I looked at Edward, an Adonis before me and my eyes traveled downward, toward his member.

He must have been embarrassed because she leaned into me, blocking my view and brushing my center, so tantalizingly close that I begged, "Edward, please," it came out so quiet, almost breathlessly, but there was no mistaking that it was a plea.


	3. Chapter 3

He looked into my eyes, "Bella," he said warily, "I don't know if I can do this. It's so hard to think. I just want to take you."

"Who's stopping you," I lifted my head up to try to meet his lips, but he firmly pushed me into the sofa.

"Bella, what if I hurt you," his eyes showed his worry and voice faltered.

"You won't," I was firm in my conviction that he loved me too much to hurt me. I was not afraid, could not be afraid of him. I was only aware of him pressing into me, desperate for more.

"Bella," he changed tactics," we were going to wait…your virtue," he protested weakly. His resolve was faltering. His eyes, which only moments before had been the golden color I loved had turned black with lust. He wanted this just as much as I did.

"You said we would try," I reminded him of his promise.

"Yes, but, virtue," he replied weakly.

I suddenly remembered something, "Alice," I practically shouted, lifting myself off of the sofa to get the bag she had given me.

"She's not here," he reminded me while gently, but firmly, pushing me downward, "besides, he lowered himself and began kissing my neck, nipping and licking along the way, "I'm not letting you go yet."

My mind began to fall backward as he continued downward and my body turned traitor under his hands before something screamed within me, "wait," I shouted trying to get off the sofa.

He growled, lower and louder than before, "Bella, I WANT YOU," he emphasized the words, staring into my eyes, dazzling me.

"No, that's not what I meant," I protested, shoving my hands against his chest to get up.

Again, he pushed me downward, growing impatient, grinding into me," Then what did you mean?"

"Um," he was distracting me oh so well, "the box, with the bag, paper…Alice," coherency seemed to be a lost cause.

He sighed, and let me sit up a bit, "Bella, please explain a bit better."

"In the bag Alice gave me, there's a shoe box with a piece of paper in it, let me get it."

He looked skeptically down at me, before leaning in for a chaste kiss and saying, "let me get it."

He was up and back quickly…but not as quickly as I wanted him to be. My body craved him beyond anything I had ever imagined and I needed him as close to me as I could get.

He did not immediately lower himself onto me as before but looked down at me, "Bella," his tone was questioning, "do you know what this is?"

I shook my head; I had an idea, but was afraid that I was completely wrong.

"It's a marriage license," he replied, "Our marriage license."

He produced a pen from what seemed like nowhere, signed and handed it to me.

"Witness?" I squeaked out.

"Alice," he smiled knowingly. I hesitated. "Bella, if you don't want to do this…" he trailed off, but I saw a smirk on his face.

"You don't fight fair."

"Never said I did."

I signed and before I could blink, the paper was gone along with my panties, Edward having ripped them off and discarded them somewhere in the room.

He posed his member at my entrance, looking me in the eye, "Bella, I'm," his voice sounded pained, "I don't want to hurt you."

"Edward," I put my hand on his cheek, "I'll be ok."

He hovered over me and I leaned up to kiss him, softly, slowly. He met me, leaning down and then pushed into me, slowly, aching slowly.

I poised myself, readying for the pain, but it didn't come. All I could feel was him inside me.

He paused, groaning, moaning, "Oh God, Bella," his voice was strained moaning it out, stretching my name around his mouth.

"Oh God, Edward," I moved my hips upward, meeting him.

"Bella," he chanted like a prayer and began moving, thrusting forward. My hips bucked upward, begging him deeper.

He leaned downward, his lips trailing along my neck, his hand wrapping around my waist, lifting me upward, allowing him deeper access.

The whimpers and moans increased, melding together. The pace increased, my hands desperate to find purchase on his body. His lips touching me wherever he could, our mouths meeting in a flury of desire.

Then, I felt it. The feeling had begun to build, drawing itself through my body, raging the thrusts forward, pushing me toward the edge.

Edward's grip on me tightened, melding our bodies until there was nothing between us. His right hand gripped the top portion of the sofa and I was vaguely aware of movement beneath me, but I was too far gone to fully register what was happening.

"Edward, I…I, something's happening," I tried to explain as the feeling grew.

"Bella," he growled, "my sweet wonderful Bella." We gripped each other, our mouths crashing together, our tongues searching each other out when, I… exploded outward. "Edward," I screamed. My body felt like it was tearing itself apart with pleasure. It ricocheted outward, pulling me along, forcing me to feel everything. It was like nothing I had ever felt before and I couldn't imagine anything better than this.

My walls tightened around Edward's member involuntarily and I heard him scream my name and a fierce crack went through the air as I feel downward.

I realized that the sofa had been broken in two.

I panted, trying to regain my breath when I began shaking, violently with laughter.

"Bella," Edward huffed above, trying to breath normally, "What's so funny," he sounded almost angry.

I waived my hand, dismissing the question, "Nothing, "I continued to giggle and felt him tighten again inside me, the vibrations making both of us moan. Still, the laughter did not stop.

"Bella," He growled, a wonderfully sensual sound, as he lowered his face to my ear, "tell me," he demanded.

"No," I refused. I could play this game to; besides, I had a feeling I was going to enjoy the punishment for not telling him.


End file.
